Dear Zack,
Here is the story of your birth.
Peter (Daddy) and Tasha (Mommy) were interested in having a baby, but Mommy lost her period for a year due to a medication she was on, so she was really worried about infertility – she didn’t know what had happened at first. They kept waiting for it come back but it never did – or so it seemed.
Well, for their summer vacation in 2008, they went to High Sierra, a music festival in San Francisco. Four days before the vacation, Mommy started to get sick every morning, and throughout the vacation, she had bad burpsies and sicky times very often. She could not figure out what was wrong, and she had not been drinking in the least!
Then when she returned home she was sick at work for two days, then decided to call the doctor and ask him what was wrong – she thought maybe she had stomach cancer. The doctor agreed to see her that evening so she went in and explained what she had been feeling. He said “Well, let’s try a pregnancy test.” Mommy thought that was funny, since she still had no period, so did not realize she might still get pregnant.
Well, he came back and said “You are very pregnant!” She was overjoyed since she had wanted a baby for some time and was very worried about the possibility that she might not be able to conceive. Funny thing was, Daddy had said before she left for her appointment that he thought she was probably pregnant.
So then Mommy went through about 8 months of sicky and nausea and burpsies, but the reward at the end was worth every second.
In September, when Mommy was about 5 months pregnant, a band that Mommy and Daddy really liked who had gone into retirement, Phish, decided to make a comeback. They announced one series of shows – three nights in Hampton, Virginia. The tickets were impossible to get, but in January a friend they had traveled with, Tara, decided to ask Mommy if she would mind if Daddy was offered an extra ticket she had.
Well, since both Mommy and Daddy really wanted to go and had been to all the hiatus shows and comeback shows so far – she was thrilled that would Daddy have a chance to go. So she said “Yes, please to save the tickets for him.” Daddy was ecstatic and decided if baby Zack came early enough he would go.
Close to the due date, Mommy started to feel really ready, and having heard that many women with boys due had gone into overtime with pregnancy, she stated to rub her belly here and there and tell baby Zack – you – to come out now. She also started drinking raspberry tea, which is supposed to help moms go into labour.
Well, on February 22nd, a Sunday, things started. The day before, Daddy and Mommy had gone to the movies and seen Coraline in 3-D, and Mommy had been uncomfortable all day. On Sunday Daddy had planned to go skiing with Grandpa Lane.
So at about 5 a.m., Mommy was sleeping on the couch downstairs and Daddy was upstairs, and Mommy started to feel some cramping. She had never had menstrual cramps or anything of the sort, so she was not sure if it was Braxton Hicks contractions, or false labour, or the real thing. So she sort of tried to cat nap in between the 5-minutes-apart, 1-minute-long cramps… which were in fact contractions – but she was not sure yet.
At 7 a.m., Daddy went skiing and did not say goodbye – so Mommy never told him what was going on. She decided to call the midwife and ask if this was for real. The midwife thought since she was two days from her official due date, it was probably for real, and Daddy should be called home. She also said that if Mommy felt that it was false labour she could have a hot bath and maybe they would go away – if not, then it was definitely for real. So Mommy drew herself a hot bath and jumped in – it slowed things down but did not stop them.
At about 9 o’clock Mommy decided she had to call Daddy and tell him to come home. He was already almost 2 hours away, and it took him till 11 a.m. to get home. By this time, Mommy had been having contractions at home alone for approximately 6 hours.
The midwife had said to call if anything major changed in the contractions. Mommy could not really tell yet if anything had changed, as they were still about 5 minutes apart and 1 minute long that whole time. Daddy wanted to go by the book, so to speak, and they were trying to draw on their prenatal class for guidelines about how labour should be going.
At 11:30 things changed. Mommy started to feel like she had to bear down – involuntarily – and it was kind of scary and felt really painful… it also felt like she had to go number 2 really bad.
So Mommy told Daddy to call the midwife. Daddy said, “Why don’t you?” and Mommy said, “’Cause I can’t – I’m in pain.”
Daddy called, and the midwife, N, heard Mommy in the background and said, “I’ll be right there.” She arrived at noon. She immediately checked to see how far Mommy was dilated and said, “You’re fully dilated – do you want to have the baby here?”
Daddy said, “F*** no!” and then said “Figure out how we are getting to the hospital,” which was five minutes away.
N said, “Do you have a car that the seats go all the way down in?” We did, and Daddy quickly packed the car and rolled the seat back. N said to Mommy, “You cannot push at all on the ride,”; but since it was involuntary to push, this was very hard.
So Daddy followed N to the hospital and they arrived at just before 1pm. It was the LONGEST 5-minute ride Mommy ever had.
Arriving at the birthing unit at Guelph General Hospital, there was another midwife, M, waiting for us at the entrance with a wheelchair. M and N quickly got Mommy up into the room and set up to push.
By 1:00 p.m., the delivery was going down. One of the harder things about this was that they got there so ready to go that Mommy could not take any drugs to help with the pain, and she was sure she needed them to get through it.
One of the other hard things about this process was experiencing the slow progress your head made on its way out. Push and Push and Push and then your head would slide back in… then finally pushing your head out through the “burning ring of fire.”
You were born Zack Zoltan Lane, on February 22nd, 2009. You were 6 pounds, 14 ounces.
Zack, I saw you and at first you looked all wrinkly and white – but they put you on my chest and wrapped you up, and before I knew it you were pinking up and looking as cute as ever. You were a beautiful baby – everyone thought so.
I was in love with you the first moment that you were laid on my chest. I could not believe what I had just gone through, and despite not getting any drugs, how little I recalled the pain I had just gone through. In fact, somehow it all seemed enjoyable now. With you on my chest everything changed. Daddy was so proud.
I was so hungry and the midwives asked if I wanted a snack and I said yes. Daddy went to the kitchen and got me a piece of peanut butter toast with raspberry jam – my favorite. Then I decided to have a shower – that was right in the birthing suite. I bled all over the bathroom floor and thought to myself, “Glad that wasn’t at home!”
When I got out of the shower I had a hot meal waiting for me; hospital food isn’t that great but this was delicious. At this point I felt like I was getting the spa treatment. The midwives were testing and checking you out. Daddy was waiting for me to finish my meal. Daddy’s parents, Grandma and Grandpa Lane, were on their way. They arrived at about 7 p.m. and visited and held you for a while, and then they all went out for dinner to celebrate your birth with Daddy. I stayed at the hospital and relaxed. I was enthralled with my new baby – you!
Daddy came back a little drunk at about 10:30 and rocked you to sleep. Then he left at about 11 p.m. to go home to stay with Grandma and Grandpa.
I stayed in the hospital overnight and only once got woken up by you choking – but I jumped up and patted you on the back and called the nurse and you were fine. Other than that you slept through the night.
When I got up I decided that you were ready to go home, and called Daddy to say that we would like to come home in the afternoon. So Grandma and Grandpa and Daddy all came back to the hospital that afternoon, and Grandma and Grandpa said goodbye for now and Daddy and I got you bundled up and in your car seat for your first ride home. You were very well behaved for it!
When we got home we settled in to our new family and welcomed Grandma Barb and Aunt Cheyenne and Cousin Jurrien for a visit.
And that was how you came into the world. In about two weeks, I was mostly recovered from the labour and delivery. The midwives came to visit us at home so they could check us both out – it was nice not to have to go out that first two weeks after the delivery. We stayed under their care for 6 weeks.
And baby Zack – you came in time for Daddy to bond with us both and help us out the first few weeks, and then he was able to go to see Phish in Hampton! Grandma Lane stayed with us to help out. It was a nice trip.
The adventure begins: two people that are kids at heart have their own kid! We love you very much and are extremely happy to have finally met you.
***
Shared by Tasha Kravchenko, from Guelph, Ontario, Canada.